Chewton Glen Hotel - New Milton, United Kingdom 

Tell them the emperor has no clothes! We booked a junior suite plus a three course meal for two (?65ea) and breakfast (?20ea) at 567.50 per night. Not the cheapest deal but it was a special occasion. We were pleased with the room although felt is was probably overpriced. On arrival there were some organisational problems. On arrival we asked for a pot of tea for two in our room with no biscuits. This was delivered promptly but cost ?15. This must be the most expensive cup of tea in the world. Returning from the beach we went to dinner and started by having a drink in the bar. This was accompanied by canap?s. On both evenings these looked and tasted disgusting. We had great difficulty in finding out what they were made of. You could almost see the fingerprints of the guy who moulded them. My advice would be that they should send their canap? maker back to Canap? School. On entering the dining room we were shown to the only table that did not have a view over the garden despite the fact their were other tables with garden views free - so we spent the evening looking at a wall. They say you can tell a restaurant by its bread and that certainly was the case here. It was awful. Then we were treated to an amuse bouche which was a small cup of soup which lacked any character other than the fact that it looked like dishwater. I ordered a fillet steak cooked medium and my wife ordered halibut. The halibut was purple when it arrived and looked disgusting but actually tasted good. My steak was a disaster. The chef has a technique whereby he extracts every last drop of moisture from the meat without burning it. This makes it impossible to eat without immense effort. Definitely the worst steak I've ever had. For dessert we chose apple frangipani accompanied by a crumble. Finding it burnt we complained and were told that they were difficult to cook so they were always burnt. Even though the maitre d' initially insisted they were not burnt eventually he agreed that they were and agreed to replace them. All that could be said about the replacements is they were less burnt than the originals. Without asking we were told by the ma?tre d' he would reduce our bill by the cost of the steak and the frangipanis. Needless to say when we checked out there we found we were charged the full price. Breakfast was another experience we had a continental breakfast. My wife asked for a hard boiled egg (something that is standard with breakfast on the continent in my experience). When it arrives the shell was broken and the water in which it was boiled was inside the shell. Imagine my astonishment to find out when we checked out that ?5 had been added to my bill for this. I ordered porridge for breakfast - I waited 40 minutes and complained to the manager. He said "I never took the order." I never got the porridge but was still charged for breakfast. The next evening meal was much the same as the first with me refusing to eat a grilled sole which made me want to retch. We decided we could not risk eating again in the restaurant so skipped breakfast on a day of departure but were still charged for it (?40 it said on the menu). Frankly this it the most overrated hotel that I've ever stayed in. They charge Michelin two rosette prices but deliver meals that cannot compete with a poor gastro-pub. There are endless managers who can't manage and that's why the prices are so high. If you stay here you've got to be out of your mind.

The weather was absolutely glorious as we arrived at the impressive entrance to the grounds and drove down the winding driveway passed woodland and immaculately manicured gardens. The first sighting of the hotel more than lived up to the publicity photographs we had seen. We were warmly greeted on our arrival by the Deputy Manager while our car was valet parked, We were given a brief tour of the hotel facilities before being shown to our room. The bedroom was beautifully furnished and extremely well proportioned ( with wall length floor to celing storage). Complimentary handmade chocolates, a bottle of champagne on ice box and fresh fruit were waiting for us together with a hand-written welcome card from the Managing Director. The large bathroom had a wonderfull double walk-in shower cubicle; his and her hand basins; double bath and a separate room with toilet and bidet. The addition of a built in TV screen at the end of the bath and ceiling speakers added to the wow factor. We ordered afternoon tea which was very promptly delivered to our room on an immaculately presented tray. Dinner that sunny evening was served on the Dining Room Terrace overlooking the lawns. Very romantic. The service was exemplary and the food was cooked to perfection while the wine from the extensive list complemented perfectly. We took a wrong turn when retiring to our room and found ourselves in another wing, however the courteous Night Porter came to our 'rescue' and guided us safely back. Breakfast was served on the Terrace and in the Dining Room with a very comprehensive selection of items available and those not displayed could be requested e.g. porridge which was prepared and arrived very promptly. The Full English Breakfast was beautifully cooked and presented. The Spa is the 'Jewel in the Crown'. The ten treatment rooms are sound proofed, have subdued lighting and of course relaxing, theraputic background music is played. The staff were immaculately dressed in elegant black uniforms. The Relaxation Room was a wonderful peaceful experience. The swimming pool and the hydro-therapy pool were wonderful - the descreet attendants made sure there were an ample supply of fresh towels and robes to hand. The Changing Rooms were extremely well equipped and very clean The Spa restaurant had a good selection of healthy items in their buffet and these could either be eaten in the dining area there or on the outside terrace. On checking out we were offered complimentary refreshments for the journey home and route directions and they could not have been more helpful. We thoroughly enjoyed our relaxing stay at Chewton Glen and would recommend it very highly.